When Someone Bully You...

A friend of mine whose in the middle of a family challenge, who also practices A Course in Miracles shared with me about a former partner who has been sending her very negative emials, and how difficult has been for her to deal with the experience.

Although because of her forgiveness process she is being able to experience more peace, that being said, every once in a while she finds herself reacting to her former partner comments and replying to his email.

I was having the same challenge with someone whom I was also involved in a relationship with, and another friend, whom I truly trust with my affairs responded with the following email:

“My feeling is that when I have received an email of this sort (attacking), my lesson/test is to delete it without response and simply focus on my love for the "attacker". ANY response is a sacrifice of power and a distraction. I Love You Nick and we will talk but give this no attention because it needs none. All temptations are nothing more than that.“

That helped me so much, that I shared it with my friend. Then she emailed me the following comment:

“If I allow him to bully me, he will keep bullying me. I can be kind and still stand up and have a voice. A kind, firm, Christ-like voice!”

Below is what I felt moved to share with her, which as always, is really an opportunity for me to remember what I have to learn, or practice:

“Dear friend, With practice, the time comes when he can bully you, without you been affected. That being said, yes, if you need to speak your truth, you simply speak it. This is not about being oppressed, it is about recognizing BOTH of your innocence without judgment, always remembering to bring in the Holy Spirit first!

Because in any situation, when we invite the Holy Spirit, we respond to the situation, ‘if’ a response is needed. But when we bring in the ego, we ‘react’ to the situation.

The thing is, if we try to convince someone of our point of view, is like trying to convince a rattlesnake to stop biting, when that is their nature (yes, it is our projection, but follow me on this thought). The best thing with a rattlesnake would be to instead of trying to negotiate with it, to simply get out of its way, and go on with our life (to not respond to their emails, unless it is absolutely necessary, and again, with the Holy Spirit).

So if you still need to deal with him because of kids, or other responsibilities, the answer is still always the same: bring in the Holy Spirit, and just be present. As long as he is not picking up a chair and try to throw it at you, if it's just words, to let them slide.

Like the old saying, "Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never kill me."

I did not say it was easy, but again, with practice, you’ll experience that inner transformation, which is nothing but the recognition that love is all that there is, no matter what it look like on the outside.

However, because of your situation, as you have already learned, and continue to do so, you are experiencing healing on a much deeper level, and becoming more loving as a result of that. Specially since he is an outward representation of an inward condition. He, who is really ‘your own’ projection, is giving you an opportunity for you to heal your mind. Don’ you love him? :o)”

So congratulation!!! Continue doing the amazing work that you do, and know that Love Is!”

I hope you enjoyed this post, and, have I told you lately that I love you? :=)

Remember to order a copy of Nick's book What Happens When You Let God at: www.TruthAndMiracles.com or www.WhatHappensWhenYouLetGod.com
And to hire Nick to speak at your church, college or corporate event, simply visit: www.NickArandesPomo.com